At the Trout Underground, we call a spade a spade.
So when the
Online Dating Task Force at Trout Underground/Man Cave World Headquarters dreams up a
surefire winner like Catch.com -- a dating service reserved exclusively for fly fishers -- we're not shy about saying it's sheer genius, baby.
Genius.
And hell, that's just the tip of the fly rod.
Kissing too many carp in your search for a prince? (Torvald Lekvam photo)
We're also tooling up
Catch&Release.com -- a dating service for those
unwilling (or unable) to make a lasting commitment.
We're even idly considering
IPrettyMuchHateYou.com -- the dating service for resentful trout bums and most steelheaders.
Is This Good, Or What?If you've read this far (and who
wouldn't), you realize we're not the kind of fly fishers who waste energy brainstorming more realistic anal gills on midge patterns.
No sir. We're Big Picture types -- hard at work
improving our wealth position the lot of the single or divorced fly fisher (which seems to be most of them).
And
we need your help to do it.
This Is The Audience Participation PartClearly, the Underground's not suffering from a shortage of high-powered intellects, but here at Man Cave Headquarters, we're largely
unwilling to get our hands dirty doing actual work.
So we want the Undergrounders to do it for us.
What do we need? Marketing, baby. We need advertising slogans and headlines.
So far, we've come up with improved versions of those mind-numbing Match.com ads, where the happy couple gaze into each other's eyes and say sappy things.
We figure we'd just rip them off (hell, they look pretty cheap to produce), and so far, we've got:
"The second she got her hands on my Trout, I knew she was the one for me."
"Once he showed me pictures of his great, big Steelhead, I fell in love on the spot."
"When I saw him expertly gut and clean that stockie, I was basically afraid to say no."
Genius all, but we need more, and we're
willing to give away yet another copy of Patrick McManus' new outdoor humor book to get it.
Yes, it's another valuable prize from the Underground!Got a killer headline? A better concept? An idea so good, you'll risk public humiliation to publish it?
If so, fire away, Undergrounders. We'll give it a week or so, at which time we'll let Wally the Wonderdog pick a winner (we print the entries, place them on the floor with treats on them, and see which he eats first).
Clearly, the fate of fly fishing's huddled masses of single people now lies with you. We
know you'll give it the respect it deserves.